I can’t start this post without saying that this is so freaking hard. And, honestly? I am still working on reaching that perfect level of control over my happiness.
Some days are bad.
I get anxious, dizzy, and I can’t breathe when I think about things not playing out the way I imagined they would or losing the things (people, opportunities etc) that currently make me so happy.
BUT, when I think about the peace that I gain when I put those thoughts aside and focus on bettering myself, mind, body, and soul, I know that that’s the only thing that will keep me sane when things are out of control.
So, regardless of where you are in life; in a relationship, in a marriage, heartbroken, or even just happy doing you, understanding that happiness belongs to you is so important.
Most of our lives we search for things that will make us happy.
We have this idea that when we reach a certain age, get married, have kids, obtain a certain job, everything will magically be perfect in our lives and we will achieve permanent happiness.
However, we don’t take into consideration the fact that life is not constant. Things continuously occur that interrupt our life flow and inevitably distort the picture of happiness we have set in our minds.
As a result, we sometimes find ourselves depressed or anxious, unable to muster the courage to function in our daily lives the way we once did.
The truth of the matter is that:
People come and go. They change their minds, they “fall” out of love (although I don’t believe it was ever truly love if they were able to “fall” out of it), they disappoint you, (the list can go on and on), things change, we lose our jobs, we have to move to a new town, you name it. But YOU, YOU will always have YOURSELF. Regardless of where other people go,or what changes in your life, you are with yourself until the day that you die.
If you give your happiness to a temporary person or thing you are susceptible to ending up miserable when it ends up disappointing you.
Taking responsibility for your happiness not only relieves pressure from your loved ones from always being the person you need them to be (although there’s nothing wrong with that when it’s from the heart), but it immensely reduces your stress and even makes you a more desirable person; people are attracted to happy/confident people.
So today, consider the things that you do that make you happy; make a list.
For example, some of the things that make me happy include:
- Deep conversations with cool people.
- Spending time with family and friends.
Once you’ve done that, make the conscious effort to not only add these things to your daily life, but to remember and turn to these things whenever it feels like life is coming down on you.
Practice this over and over until your reaction to difficulty is met with a turn towards things that make you happy rather than despair.
You are more than capable of obtaining and maintaining your happiness.
It’s up to you to take the initiative and recover control of it.