Loving yourself is hard in a world that constantly has a full display for us to take in on what “perfection” is, how amazing it supposedly is and what we need to do to replicate it.
Whether it’s on TV, in magazines, or through social media, we continuously take in this picture.
Unfortunately many of us, myself included, waste our time trying to make our lives live up to it.
If only we could buy the right set of clothes, talk the right people, try specific activities, we think we’ll actually have that perfect life in which we’re happy and others will love us. We legitimately pursue those things.
We compare ourselves and open up to becoming frustrated and upset when we can’t emulate the picture of perfection.
Perfection isn’t possible.
Everyone in one way or another has their flaws, and we are simply handed the edited version of their lives through the different portals I mentioned before.
Disengaging from something that consumes our everyday life is hard, but saying no to comparison and getting rid of that picture of perfection allows us to find inner peace and satisfaction in our own lives.
We should make the conscious effort to forget about the all the things that try to grab our attention and take the time to figure out what we love/what makes us happy, simply because it makes us happy, and pursue it.
Create your own, unique, picture of perfection. Flaws and all.
These are some of the ways that I have learned to love myself, hopefully, some of them will resonate with you:
1. Going to Therapy.
I used to think that going to therapy was for people with very intense problems. Like somehow my problems could not possibly compare to someone that has lost someone or has gotten divorced or has contemplated suicide etc. But then I lost someone and more than a year later I decided to actually go therapy. Taking that step helped me realize something. Going to therapy is more than just about having some very intense problem you need to have assessed. It’s about confiding in someone all of the things that go on in your mind and working on making sense of our lives. It’s definitely hard but very much productive. My therapist helps me to understand how past events have affected me in order to continue down a journey of emotional healing.
2. Creating a Workout Routine.
Whether you’re already fit or you don’t really care too much about having a healthy lifestyle working out seriously has so many benefits. Personally, it motivates me to be productive, it helps clear my mind and it reduces my stress level. Yes, it has been hard sometimes to keep the consistency when there are days I’m overcome with tiredness, but working out has become a part of me now. I feel weird when I don’t do it and when I finally do it and I experience the benefits I question why I didn’t just push through.
3. Disconnecting from Technology.
I cannot stress this one enough. Honestly, I crave doing this more than I get the chance to. When I disconnect I feel refreshed/rejuvenated. There’s something about putting your phone far away where you can’t see it (I like to leave it in my bedroom and go to the kitchen or living room) and spend time writing, watching a movie, reading a book; doing anything other than waiting for texts and opening my social media accounts every five minutes.
4. Spending time doing things you love.
Although I started this blog last year, (my one year anniversary was last week🎉🎉) it wasn’t until the end of last year that I really started to actively write on here. At first, I was really nervous because I’d be sharing my thoughts with the world and I didn’t know how it would fare. But, I knew it was something that I wanted to do so I mustered the courage and did it. It has been incredibly liberating and personally rewarding and I encourage you to do whatever it is you like to do. Whether it’s writing, singing, painting, exercising; anything. Even if you’ve never tried it before, do it. Get lost in it and see where it takes you.
5. Being honest about what you think and feel.
Some of you might not relate, but if you’re anything like me, you have gotten caught up in caring so much about what other people think that you deny yourself in order to keep them happy. Honestly, it benefits no one. Sure people might get upset and it may be really hard to muster up the courage but in the long run, you will not only gain respect (even if it’s your own) but you will live a less stressful life. Keep in mind that people that care about you will consider your thoughts and feelings, not shame you or manipulate you with them.
You are such a beautiful, amazing, and capable person no matter how different your life may look from the picture the world shows us.
I challenge you today to forget about looking like x person or trying to do x things because that’s what this person does, and try things that actually interest you and truly make you happy.
Whether you choose some of the things from my list or you take the time to come up with your own, love yourself by doing things that are good for you and make you happy.
Love yourself, love yourself hard because honestly you deserve it, and the world could use your talented, amazing, and unique self.